Dating Nightmares: RUN TO THE HILLS!

Okay. First I’d like to say that if you EVER find yourself talking yourself into going on a date with someone, you may want to think again about this person.  “Women’s Intuition” is a real thing, and you should never, ever go against your inner voice.

That being said, lets roll back twenty years, yes I said TWENTY! (lol) To the summer of 1992, when I was 23 years old.  I met “Jeff” (I’m using a fake name to protect the guilty!) at a night club that was a hot spot back then.  He was part owner of this establishment and I thought that represented stability.

“Jeff” got flirty with me on many occasions but I always ignored his advances because he just wasn’t my ‘type’.  He was 30, and to me that was borderline old. Especially considering he was balding and a bit chunky.  I was not attracted to him whatsoever, but I thought “Hey! Don’t be so shallow and give this guy a chance.”  So I agreed to go out on a date with him.

At my request, we met up at the club he owned. I remember always wanting to drive myself back then because if I wanted to “BAIL!!” I could always do so because no one drove me, I drove myself.  I always had an “Out”, and driving yourself gives you that freedom.

From the nightclub we went to a nice restaurant. I don’t recall the name of the restaurant but I do remember ordering seafood and a glass of white wine and loving it!  The conversation went surprisingly well.  He was quick witted, funny, and had some interesting stories to tell that actually kept my attention. To his credit, that is not an easy thing to do because I have a notoriously SHORT attention span.

We left the restaurant and as we drove by this Keno ‘parlor’, we quickly made a U-turn and parked his car in the parking lot. (I agreed to let him drive to the restaurant.)  In a state of confusion, I asked “What are you doing, Jeff?” He said, “I’ll be right back, this will just take a second.”

So I waited patiently in the car for about 20 minutes and was getting annoyed by then. Alas, I saw my short, pudgy, balding date exit the building with a horrible scowl on his face. I was asking myself why would he be so angry right now? Did he have a fight with an ex-girlfriend? I awaited my answer as he opened the door to get back in the car.

I immediately asked, “What is going on?” And he began hollering a bunch of obscenities and pounded his first on the dashboard. Red flags went off in my head.

He proceeded to tell me that he went in and placed a Hundred dollar bet on ONE number and lost. He was filled with anger, as more red flags went off in my head!  By then I was really annoyed and uncomfortable and just wanted him to take me back to my car. I mean who does that??? Not only that, but who does that ON A DATE?

The first half of the drive back was silent, as he calmed down and gathered his thoughts. He apologized. I accepted the apology taking comfort in knowing I’d be at my car soon and away from him.

He began explaining his actions, apologizing again and while he pulled up to my car, asked me if I wanted to go look at some of his pictures from high school and college.

I took pity on him and agreed.  I mean what harm could there be in that? (I was SO NAIVE back then!)

So there we are in his living room and I’m thinking maybe the night isn’t a wash? Maybe I overreacted to leaving me in the car, maybe I overreacted to him freaking out, maybe I overreacted to the fact that he just blew $100 on one number on a Keno bet.   (I used to doubt myself a lot back then.)

He brought out two photo albums with the excitement of a child at Christmas time.  He handed me the first album, and I saw his high school graduation photo. (I thought WOW! What happened to YOU in the last 12 years!)  He was a looker back then! I proceeded to flip through the pages as if I was interested, making forced comments about each picture.

Then he handed me the second photo album.  By then I was just really bored.  “Is it the attention span thing or is it him?”,  I questioned myself silently. With this argument going on in my head I opened the second album, I could feel him getting excited for me to turn the page. I wondered what he was getting all excited about.  I turned the page. (Why I never went straight home, I’ll never know!)

There it was. At first I couldn’t quite make it out. I heard him laughing. I looked at the picture again. Then it CAME TO ME! I was horrified and disgusted and made sure I knew where the EXIT was.

He excitedly explained the picture to me.  I looked at him with pure disgust and checked the door again. I thought to myself “RUN!!!”  He couldn’t believe my reaction. He said, “but it’s FUNNY!” I handed the album back to him and grabbed my purse.  Still in shock.   All I could think of is “I’ve GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE!”

Once again he said, “It’s FUNNY!”

I  replied, “I see NO HUMOR in a picture of ‘poop’ in a toilet bowl shaped like the number EIGHT!”  Shut the door, and ran quickly to my car.

End of date.  I pulled out of his driveway both disgusted and relieved to get AWAY FROM HIM!

I’ve never looked at the number 8 the same since that night.

We’ve all had our share of bad dates, and this is one of many for me! Let’s see what my comrades have to say about their worst date ever.

Froggie (Tracey): One frog’s distinct voice on the world around her.

Merry Land Girl (Melissa): Tales of a suburban mom who likes to talk about pop culture, books, Judaism, family, friendship and anything else that comes to mind.

Momarock (Sara): A Mom on the run



3 thoughts on “Dating Nightmares: RUN TO THE HILLS!

  1. Melissa says:

    That takes the cake for worst date ever!!! WOW!! Just wish you used a different name for him though. The poop picture sounds hilarious but that’s from an outsider’s viewpoint and I’m immature about that kind of stuff, having kids who like to talk about potty stuff. GREAT post and fun topic!

  2. Jeanette says:

    Haha…actually Melissa, that IS his real first name! Can’t remember his last name for the life of me though! Thanks! I think it’s funny as well, disgusting, but funny! Plus it was over 20 years ago so of course I can laugh at myself. I’ve HAD to learn to that’s for sure! I always say “if you can’t laugh at yourself, you have no business laughing at others!” 🙂

  3. coversaralea says:

    Oh my friend, what a horrible date! LOL!!!! It’s hard to believe that people would actually keep a photo album of that sort of crap, no pun intended! 😉

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